From Surviving to Thriving: Sleep Strategies for Life with a Newborn
Infant sleep can feel overwhelming, but there are ways to make it just a little bit easier. In fact, sleep with a newborn is never perfect, but there are a few strategies that can help you feel more grounded and supported during this season. Try one, two, or all five—take what works for you and leave the rest.
1. Start Preparing Before Birth
Before your baby arrives, spend some time learning about what newborn sleep actually looks like (spoiler alert: it’s not 12-hour stretches just yet). Even more importantly, talk with your partner about your sleep expectations, needs, and values. Do you need to prioritize long stretches for one parent or can you share the load? Will you nap when the baby naps, or is that not realistic for you? Having these conversations early can help prevent a lot of resentment when you’re both running on fumes.
Download my free guide for partners to guide your discussion.
2. Support Your Baby’s Circadian Rhythm Development
Babies aren’t born with a clear sense of day and night, but you can support them as their natural rhythms take shape. Expose your baby to natural light in the morning, get outside when possible, dim lights in the evening, and keep nighttime interactions calm and quiet. Over time, this helps your baby’s body learn the difference between day and night.
Take this quiz on circadian rhythms to find out more!
3. Build a Brief and Sustainable Bedtime Routine
Simple and consistent routines—like bathing, feeding, changing, or a lullaby before sleep—can help your baby associate certain cues with rest over time and will set your family up for longer term success. Choose a routine that feels sustainable for your family. Ask questions like, “Can I do this most nights?” or “Can more than one caregiver complete the routine?” or “Is this routine physically demanding?”
Here’s an example of a brief and sustainable bedtime routine:
Dim lights
Bath or wipe-down
Fresh pajamas
Feeding
Lullaby or book
Crib or bassinet
Lights out and goodnight!
Repetition over time will help your baby recognize that it’s time to wind down as they grow and develop.
4. Share the Load (You Don’t Have to Do This Alone)
Caring for a newborn takes a village. It is as much or more work than a full time job and requires both physical and mental acuity. Consider a shared model, such as shift sleeping or alternating responding to wake-ups. Protecting at least 4–5 hours of uninterrupted sleep can make a huge difference in how you feel and can protect against mental health disorders.
Here’s an example of what shift sleeping might look like:
One parent rests 8 p.m. – 1 a.m. while the other covers the baby.
Switch for the 1 a.m. – 6 a.m. stretch.
Breast or bodyfeeding? Consider ways to protect the feeding parent while shift sleeping.
Alternatively, consider overnight support from a friend, family member, or doula when financially accessible.
5. Prioritize Your Own Mental Health
Even when you prepare, sleep deprivation is one of the biggest stressors in early parenthood, and chronic exhaustion can contribute to postpartum mood and anxiety disorders. Protecting your rest—even in small increments—helps buffer against these challenges.
If you find yourself struggling, you’re not alone. Organizations like Perinatal Support Washington and Postpartum Support International (PSI) offer free, confidential help lines and local support. Reaching out is a sign of strength, not weakness.
Perinatal Support Washington Warm Line: 1-888-404-7763
Postpartum Support International (PSI) Helpline: 1-800-944-4773
Parenthood doesn’t come with a one-size-fits-all sleep solution. Experiment with what feels doable, be gentle with yourself, and remember—survival mode is still parenting. You and your baby are learning together, and you can reach out for support when you need it.
Want more support? Schedule a Consult or reach out to me directly for individualized support at info@kithandkincarecollective.com.
Kaitlin helps families prepare for birth, postpartum, and beyond. Kaitlin offers virtual and in-home sleep counseling for children and families from birth to age five. This includes sleep support and education that is holistic and evidence-based, prioritizes mental health, and is customized to align with your child’s age and development as well as your parenting values, goals, and choices. She is a certified sleep counselor through the Sleep Counseling Institute.